Wendy’s Blog

Knowing your compelling purpose

Wendy Smith is a Personal Coach (life ancd career). You can get in touch with her at this link

Knowing your compelling purpose – do you know what makes you want to get out of bed in the morning? Think of those dark, freezing cold, days in winter. What would it be like to get out of bed with a spring ready to go, even on frosty mornings. Having a clear purpose helps you to be happy. It can inspire you to achieve. Also, having a compelling purpose can help you to connect with other people. The energy you generate is attractive and people want to know more – they want to know you.

But, suppose you are not clear about your purpose. Perhaps, you have doubts about you ever having a compelling purpose. Having no sense of purpose can make you feel like being out on the ocean in a small boat without compass. And you just drift. Your motivation has gone and with it your energy. You feel lonely and lost.

So, how do you find your compelling purpose? How are you supposed to know where to start? How do you find your way to an energised and happy future. Working with a life coach like me will help you find and unleash your compelling purpose. You will find a clearer understanding of who you are and what you want from your life and your career.

Wendy Smith is Personal Coach (life and career) as well being a writer and poet. She writes career guides as Wendy Smith and fiction as Wendy Mason. She You can find her Amazon page at this link and find out more about her coaching services here. You can book a FREE coaching session or find out more at this link

People who drain our energy

Wendy Smith is a personal coach and author of How to Get on With the Boss . You can get in touch with her at this link

people who drain our energy

We all know people who drain our energy. Do you find yourself giving out lots of energy in support of others? But some people seem to take just a little too much. Do you give out more than you can afford to give if you are going to stay fit and cope with all that might be ahead of you.

Everyone feels insecure in the middle of life changes. But energy drainers are usually people who are insecure and negative in their everyday life! Quite often they find it difficult to tolerate their own company. You may find people like this start to depend upon you to help them make all kinds of relatively simple life decisions. They may phone or text you several times a day on any pretext. They seem to be eating you, as well as your time. Energy vampires sap your life force!

Here is a post I wrote a while ago that could help you deal with your energy vampire – Energy Drainers and how to deal with them

Wendy Smith is a personal coach committed helping people lead happier lives and feel more fulfilled. You can find out more at this link

How to handle a jealous boss

Wendy Smith is a personal coach and author of How to Get on With the Boss . You can get in touch with her at this link

Bosses, like all of us, come with a range of human emotions and one of them may be jealousy.  Given the number of visits to this post, I guess a lot of people think their boss might be jealous. And that makes them very unhappy. So here is some advice on how to handle a jealous boss. I hope it helps you.

Jealousy is usually shown in quite subtle ways in the early stages. You may not be sure that really it is jealousy they feel. Here is a useful checklist.

How jealousy might be shown – your jealous boss checklist

  • Have you been relegated to the dreary corner?
  • Do you always seem to be given the most boring work?
  • Are you often given just too much work?
  • May be, you are subject to sarcastic comments?
  • Your manager might just find fault with everything you do?
  • Or start to niggle away at a few small faults you do have?

If some of these apply, you are probably dealing with jealousy. Here are some things to try.

Your jealous boss – steps to take

First, directly confronting a jealous boss rarely works. Go carefully, particularly if you need to keep the job. It is sad, but in most organisations, unless there is a clear case of bullying, reporting your boss rarely turns out well. The benefit of the doubt will usually be given to the more senior person. Calling on the support of senior contacts against your boss might well rebound. They may not thank you for the information. They may value your boss for his/her technical abilities and your boss may have an otherwise good record.

Hard as it sound, the best approach is usually to make your boss feel you are on their side. I know this isn’t very nice. But they need to believe you are not a threat.They need to believe that, even though you might have it in you to upstage them. This is something you should never do so. Your boss needs to feel that you really will support them.

Show your boss that you respect their ability.

Show your boss that you respect their ability. And ask for their advice. It might be difficult for you at first because you feel that you too are an expert. But it will help to build your relationship. This will help to make them think of you in a kinder way.

Try to make your boss look good. Be ready to share your ideas. Accept that sometimes your ideas might be presented as theirs. If you have contacts higher up the office, be ready to share them with your boss. And, if your boss has unsung talents, make sure your senior contacts know about them.

If you do find yourself relegated to the dreary corner, see what you can do to brighten things up. In most kinds of work, there is some opportunity to make a positive mark if you look for it.

Overall – keep your dignity but turn yourself into an asset for your boss, and not a threat.

If despite all this jealousy turns into out-and-out bullying there are legal steps you can take to seek redress. Talk to an external adviser like your union official, Citizen’s Advice in the UK or even an employment lawyer about action to take.

More advice on how to handle your jealous boss

There has been a lot of interest in this subject and I’ve received lots of questions. So, I’ve written a little eBook on how to get on with the boss. In it you will learn how to make a great first and lasting impression at work. You will find out how to help your boss help you. Don’t be made unhappy, suffer stress and lose confidence because you cannot get on with the person in charge. Poor relationships at work can damage life at home as well as your career. There can be long-term effects on health and on your motivation.  My little eBook can really help you avoid the pitfalls and build a strong, positive, relationship with your boss. There is more on the eBook below but here is a quick link http://amzn.to/2mshlVJ

A coach supporting you as you deal with your boss will make you feel far more confident. I offer a free first coaching session, so, please get in touch.

Wendy Smith is a personal coach committed helping people lead happier lives and feel more fulfilled. You can find out more at this link